The SBM and I are finally locking down the last few details for the upcoming wedding. It’s a smallish, simple affair, nothing too elaborate. We’re trying to keep things as stress-free as possible. One area we figured would be a breeze was the rings. Going to need two of ‘em, round, made of something shiny, should look similar. Go to a jeweler, buy a matching set, go home. Piece of cake, right?

Well, as it turns out, according to all the jewelers we went to (and remember, these are people that are convinced people are willing to pay thousands of dollars for small chunks of carbon), no one actually wants to buy wedding bands in a set. One guy told us, “Only eight percent of people want to buy wedding bands that way,” proving once again that anyone can pull a fake statistic out of their ass. Apparently, we were informed, when a guy buys a woman an engagement ring, he’s supposed to have the forethought to also select a complementary, custom band that will fit with the diamond ring like a puzzle piece. Then, later, he needs to find himself a matching band that completes the set.

Since no one told me about this, we’re now having to scour through a wide selection of wedding bands, trying to find a pair that match, are the right size, the right widths, and are a little more interesting than just plain round. Oh, and they need to not cost forty billion dollars each.

Honestly, with all this effort, I can not understand why the divorce rate is so high…

No comments »

Do you need to shake a carton of pulp-free orange juice?

1 Comment »

A small advertising blurb on my latest Comcast bill reads “Demand more at Comcast.”

“At,” not “from.” Important distinction.

No comments »